


Enough

by TwoKidsInATrenchCoat



Category: Autodale (Web Series)
Genre: Angst, Constructive Criticism Welcome, Sort of happy ending, The Friendly Shadow origin story, Trigger Warning: Everybody (including The Helper) refers to The Helper with “it” pronouns, except for The Friendly Shadow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-14
Updated: 2021-03-14
Packaged: 2021-03-22 18:01:35
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,645
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/30042588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TwoKidsInATrenchCoat/pseuds/TwoKidsInATrenchCoat
Summary: It’s not sure when it formed a consciousness, nor when it started to develop thoughts and opinions. All it knew was that The Mayor could never know.or...One of The “Helper” Goblins realizes it can think. It hides this fact while giving its outside perspective from the very inside of Autodale.
Relationships: Hive & The Mayor, The Exceptional Woman & Hive, The Exceptional Woman & The Mayor, The Friendly Shadow & Hive, The Friendly Shadow & The Exceptional Woman, The Friendly Shadow & The Mayor, The “Helper” Goblins & Hive, The “Helper” Goblins & The Exceptional Woman, The “Helper” Goblins & The Friendly Shadow, The “Helper” Goblins & The Matriarch, The “Helper” Goblins & The Mayor, The “Helper” Goblins & The Uglies
Comments: 4
Kudos: 5





	Enough

“Helpers” that’s what The Mayor had called them. The name was self-explanatory.

It and the other Helpers were supposed to ensure that The Immortal Machine ran smoothly. They didn’t act, only reacted to a problem that needed fixing. They didn’t think, just did.

Unfortunately, developing a consciousness was making it increasingly hard not to think.

It wasn’t sure when this started, when it began to form thoughts and opinions.

Life in Autodale was routine. One could easily go through the motions day in and day out with only small variations. But these variations caused The Helper to become aware that it sometimes liked or disliked the new things it encountered.

This must have started a while ago, developing under its radar while it was going through the motions. But now it had these thoughts and opinions and there was no getting rid of them.

The Mayor could never know. If he was found out, The Helper would surely be labeled as ugly and become just more fuel for The Immortal Machine.

So it continued to go about its “life” obeying the instructions and routine it was set to follow. But as it went through the motions, its brain couldn’t seem to stop thinking and asking questions. One of the most frequently asked questions was, “How did it develop a consciousness again?”

“Lobotomized.” It vaguely recalled that that was the word The Mayor used to describe The Helpers once, although it can’t remember where or when. Something must have gone wrong. Perhaps it was a mistake when the lobotomy had first been performed. Or maybe after all this time, its brain had managed to heal itself.

The feelings The Helper felt weren’t strong ones. Certainly nothing that would allow it to understand the loneliness that Hive would later say The Mayor suffered from, but enough to influence how it completed its tasks.

Enough. That seemed to be the word. The amount one needs to just scrape by.

It couldn’t bring itself to dwell on that too much. When in doubt, just keep working. There was always another job to do to keep the Immortal Machine running.

\-----------------------------------------

The Helper knew that it had been alive for a while, probably since the very beginning of Autodale, though it couldn’t remember helping to build the town.

If it looked back, its earliest memory was when Autodale was still very new and The Mayor hadn’t gotten the hang of secrecy yet.

At least he must not have, or else he wouldn’t have let one of his Helpers wander outside.

But it had, and in looking for the tower again, The Helper somehow had wandered to where The Uglies were being killed.

The Helper immediately recognized where it was when it heard the crunch of bone followed by the thud of people falling into the ditches. Now that it knew where it was, The Helper knew how to get back, but something compelled it to stop.

Although it couldn’t see The Uglies, it could sense the fear practically radiating off of some, while others seemed calm and accepting.

This sparked an emotion it wasn’t familiar with. There was something tugging in the back of its mind, and it felt the urge to go out there and stop The Handymen.

It unconsciously took a step forward, out of the shadows. Despite being unable to see, it could feel The Uglies’ eyes suddenly turn to look at it.

“Help!”

“It’s ugly!”

“What is that?!”

“A monster!”

Immediately, The Helper went back into the shadows and fled when it heard The Handymen approach where it had been hiding.

Once it gained enough distance, it could hear The Handymen telling The Uglies, “Now, now, there’s no reason to make up stories to distract us from our work. After all, there are no monsters here.”

The Helper didn’t stop to hear the rest of whatever The Handmen were going to say. It made its way back to the tower and considered what had just happened.

It had wanted to help The Uglies. That new emotion had told it too.

But the way they had treated it, sparked an entirely different emotion. A new emotion that said, “Maybe the humans’ fate isn’t such a big deal afterall.”

It never was caught for that incident, but it learned to never leave the shadows from then on.

\--------------------------------------------

It remembers when The Exceptional Woman was brought to the tower. 

Their first interaction hadn’t been long, and could hardly be called an interaction.

The Mayor was going to show her the tank where The Matriarch’s sustenance was held. It and the other Helpers crossed paths with them.

The Helper had sensed her presence. It would have stared at her if it could see. Just the sound of a new breathing pattern was so strange and curious. So it stayed, clinging to one of the pillars even as the other Helpers moved on.

It knew that she was staring back. It could feel her eyes on it, like the eyes of The Uglies. But unlike them, she didn’t scream. She gasped and seemed surprised at first, but then just she stared back.

Perhaps she was just as curious about it as it was about her?

Them staring at each other had felt like an eternity, but probably only lasted a few seconds. Then The Mayor started speaking and had her full attention again.

The Helper observed them as they entered the room where the sustenance was held. Once it couldn’t sense them anymore, it internally shook its head and forced itself to go back to work. It had to keep working no matter how much it wanted to follow The Exceptional Woman.

Fortunately for The Helper, it soon sensed The Exceptional Woman nearby again. Coincidentally, The Helpers had first crossed her path because they were moving to go and reinforce The Matriarch’s restraints.

The job was quick and once they finished, the other Helpers moved on. But it stayed on the ground and sensed The Mayor and Exceptional Woman, rising on a platform to meet The Matriarch.

It remembered when it first sensed The Matriarch. It couldn’t see, but to hear breaths so big, and to realize the scale of her, was overwhelming to remember.

Overtime, the constant exposure had made her seem less and less impressive. But sensing The Exceptional Woman’s awe reminded it of how grand the engine of Autodale’s Immortal Machine truly was.

Personally though, it tried to avoid The Matriarch when it could. The sounds of her groans as she was given fuel only served as a reminder of how The Helper would surely be turned into sustenance for her if its emotions were ever found out.

\--------------------------------------------

The Helper had been called into Hive’s room to fix a headset that had malfunctioned and rendered one of the members mute.

“Go, fix him,” The Mayor had told it.

When The Helper entered the room, it expertly navigated the wires and webs and arrived at the member who was clearly displeased at having been silenced.

As it worked, it listened to Hive. After all, it couldn’t hurt to know what was currently giving Autodale trouble.

“The wall has been reinforced, but we shouldn’t become complacent. Autodale is big, which just means that there is more room for cracks that could allow for a breach.”

“These disgusting Freaks make me sick! We should send Handymen out to terminate them before they get the chance to set foot here!”

That declaration was immediately followed by a pair of giggles.

“You complain about Freaks-”

“Yet there’s an abomination right here in this room maintaining us!”

Their giggling intensified into cackles.

A few seconds passed before The Helper realized that the pair had been talking about it. The realization got it to pause. Only for a second or two before it resumed its work, but that was enough for Hive to notice that their words had garnered a reaction from The Helper.

“Awww, you hurt its feelings,” it heard one of the members say, although it couldn’t tell whether that comment was supposed to be sincere or sarcastic.

As the member had said that, though, The Helper connected the correct wire and the silenced member was able to speak again, “No you didn’t. They had just paused because they were making sure that the wires had been placed correctly. Besides, how can you hurt the feelings of something that can’t feel?”

He spoke in a more gruff version of Hive’s voice that conveyed such certainty that The Helper itself questioned if that was the real reason it had paused.

The giggling pair made sounds of disappointment but they couldn’t comment any further because the tone of voice that The Helper knew belonged to The Exceptional Woman spoke up, “We are getting off track. The question remains. There are situations that The Handymen have proven they can’t handle. What do we do the next time we encounter one of these situations?”

With that, the subject was changed and The Helper’s slip-up was forgotten.

It felt an emotion (that it believed The Mayor would call “gratitude”) towards the member that had made the excuse. It was tempted to believe that the member was mistaken and that it had simply gotten lucky, but as The Helper went around, checking Hive’s other headsets, it felt his eyes following it around. Not enough to be obvious to the rest of Hive, but enough that The Helper noticed and knew the member had covered up for it. 

It was not sure whether to be comforted by what he did, or very afraid. Now one being knew its secret. Could he be trusted? Was he friendly?

Even with all those worries swirling in its head, it couldn’t focus on that. There was something else bothering it.

When it had paused, it hadn’t done so because its feelings were hurt. It had paused because it was confused.

It knew that The Mayor hated The Freaks. When he had first found out about them, he despaired and banned any mention of them in his presence. So Hive was selected to be the one to deal with them. 

It didn’t make any sense for it to be even associated with The Freaks.

Freaks were those who were different. Freaks went against Autodale’s ways. Freaks didn’t belong…..

It wasn’t a Freak...was it?

\--------------------------------------------

The Helpers had multiple jobs to do in order to maintain Autodale.

Unlike The Handymen who were assigned to help build houses or protect the citizens, The Helpers were assigned to tasks that required a delicate touch that a machine couldn’t provide. One of those jobs was growing food.

They grew everything from fruits and vegetables, to give the citizens a healthy diet; to the tobacco that was used for the cigars that the citizens were occasionally allowed to indulge in.

As much as it didn’t want to have this opinion, it knew that this was its favorite job. The Helper felt the small bits of happiness its brain could provide it with whenever it was tending to the soil of the fields inside the giant warehouse.

It had turning on the different machines that would give the plants water and artificial sunlight down to an artform.

When the plants grew, The Helper felt something akin to pride. New life in this place of old and rot was fascinating. It almost felt sad when it would have to deliver the harvest to The Handymen who would put the food in another machine to be processed.

It recalled that one of the later members of Hive was inducted because they tried to figure out where the food came from instead of just accepting that it appeared on the stores’ shelves.

The Helper found that fascinating too. It had always had so many questions, it had never thought that it might be the answer to somebody else's mystery.

\--------------------------------------------

It was back in Hive’s room, replacing the tubes that ran food into Hive’s stomachs.

As it worked, Hive continued to talk about The Freaks.

“They keep on causing trouble, but we never seem equipped to deal with that trouble.”

“Yes, we send in the Handymen, but they only ever seem to make the situation worse. They don’t have the critical thinking skills necessary to deal with these delicate situations.”

“At the rate that the family members are being killed and the rest becoming Uglies, we might have to do something to keep up the population.”

A variation of Hive’s voice spoke up and was more gruff than the others. The Helper recognized the voice immediately. “Or we could stop the problem from occurring by not labeling the family members who survive as ugly.”

Immediately all of the Hive members started speaking at once. Some in consideration while others rejected the idea outright.

Once things calmed down, the most neutral voice of Hive spoke, “Please do elaborate.”

It felt a touch of nervousness from the one who spoke, although he did a good job of hiding it. “Even if one family member dies, the others tend to be labeled as ugly because of their trauma. But if we diverted a few resources to rehabilitating them, then they could become perfectly fine cogs in the machine again.”

This time, there were whispers among the other members as they considered the proposal. Finally, the neutral voice spoke again, “As much as we appreciate the sentiment, that plan is simply illogical and impractical.”

“But-”

“Take that Helper over there. It’s replacing some of the tubing that has been damaged. It could take those materials and repair them to be reused. But that wouldn’t make any sense, when it could simply replace them and discard the ones that no longer serve their purpose.

“If it did take the time to repair those tubes, that would be energy being diverted from more productive things. Not to mention, when those materials are in use again, they would not be able to perform their task as well as a tube that was brand new. So even in the best case scenario, that plan would cause the system to suffer overall.”

The other members made sounds of agreement, which was almost fortunate, because they covered up the member’s sigh of defeat. It was a small thing and the only reason that The Helper caught it was because it had been paying special attention to him since the last time it was in this room.

“Having said that, he does have a point. It would be much easier if we figured out a way to solve the problem instead of treating the symptoms.”

“Well, we said that The Handymen don’t know how to handle these situations. Perhaps we need to find or create something that does.”

“An advanced Handyman?”

“I don’t think any amount of programming would be able to give a Handyman the necessary complexities. What we need is a human mind, in a metal body. Something with the brains to be able to properly utilize the strength of a handyman while knowing when to hold back. Perhaps one of the exceptional minds here would be best suited for the job?”

“Are you crazy?!” the gruff voice spoke up once more, incredulous.

All of Hive went dead silent. All of the members stared at the voice that had dared to speak up once more.

“Thank you for volunteering,” Hive said without a hint of gratitude, “Helper? Put us to sleep and separate him from us. After we wake, we’ll continue to discuss the details of how he can be of use in helping Autodale run smoothly.”

It could hear the gruff voice protesting, but The Helper did its best to tune that out. It had a job to do. A job specifically given to it by Hive. It would complete its task even if the sound of the member’s protests sparked an emotion that The Helper didn’t have a name for. 

It walked over to the switch that would put all of the Hive members to sleep. The switch had been installed because all of them were connected, so they could feel each other’s pain. If something went wrong with one, then they would all be in pain. The switch could put them all to sleep and the member who was hurt could be separated, fixed, and eventually reassimilated.

But The Helper had a sneaking suspicion that the one who had “volunteered” wouldn’t get put back ever again.

\--------------------------------------------

The Mayor had been more than happy to help create something that would kill more Freaks. So it and the other Helpers got to work assisting him in the design.

Meanwhile Hive had begun crafting a persona for Autodale’s protector. It heard that they had dubbed him “The Friendly Shadow.”

As they worked to modify a Handyman model, The Helper wondered if this transformation would make The Friendly Shadow related to The Helpers. They were both partially machine, and partially human after all.

It quickly shakes away the thought. It’s pretty sure that the emotion it just felt was called “attachment.” That was something it couldn’t afford to be feeling. Especially because The Mayor was now pointing to it.

“You. Take The Friendly Shadow to be cleaned and prepared. Soon, we will be able to permanently fuse him with the body.”

The Helper wanted to object, but displaying an opinion would defeat the purpose of all its hard work. So it obeyed and relocated The Friendly Shadow to another room.

It was just the two of them in that room. There is no need for more than Helper. The job should have been quick since most of the work had already been done when he had first been assimilated into Hive. It was logical for The Helper to do this alone, but it was half tempted to try and switch jobs with another Helper because it could feel a flurry of emotions radiating off of The Friendly Shadow.

The Helper still wasn’t sure how it was able to sense movement, but it could sense him tilting his head repeatedly in a particular direction.

Not being able to help itself, The Helper followed The Friendly Shadow’s silent instructions and realized that he was trying to gesture to his headset. It had been removed to silence him. He clearly wanted it to put it back on him, because of course he would choose to request something that could get it caught.

The Helper knew that it didn’t have a lot of time, but it did have some. It had enough time to take pity on the being who had taken pity on it.

So it grabbed the headset and reattached it to him. 

“So you can think you can feel. I wasn’t sure at first, but now I know,” The Friendly Shadow said, his voice filled with relief.

That relief was a stark contrast to the horror that The Helper felt when it realized it had just ratted itself out. It reached to take the headset off again.

“Wait, wait, wait! I promise I won’t tell anybody. You have my word. Please, just hear me out.”

The Helper was getting really annoyed with its emotions. First they caused it to rat itself out. Now they were making it hear this man out.

Still, it tilted its head. It is not sure how it remembered this, but it knew that was a silent way of asking a question.

“I saw you pause when they called you an abomination. You can feel. Listen, we can help each other. We could get out of here. Please. I don’t want to have to wear that stupid coat, and I’m sure there’s stuff you have to do here that you don’t want to do.”

The Helper stayed silent. Leave Autodale willingly? The very idea was an oxymoron. It could feel the former Hive member getting desperate.

“We could escape. Yes, we wouldn’t have the simple pleasures in life like smoking, or...whatever it is you enjoy, but we would have our freedom. I know you can’t talk, but you can definitely understand me. Will you help me? One knock means yes, two means no.”

It knocked twice.

“Why?!”

The Helper flinched at how loud he said that, and felt itself becoming frustrated. The Friendly Shadow had gotten caught because he couldn’t repress his emotions. The Helper had not gotten caught after all this time because it had been repressing its emotions since Day 1. Now, he wanted The Helper to stop repressing and follow his lead?!

It could tell that The Friendly Shadow had picked up on its anger, but before he could try to persuade it again, The Helper took off the headset, silencing him once more.

\--------------------------------------------

Friendly Shadow would have to fulfill the purpose Autodale gave him. Despite what he might have said otherwise, The Helper knew that that was the truth.

However, as much as it hated to admit it, it knew that there were small things it could do.

So if it grew some tobacco, made some cigars, and slipped them into The Friendly Shadow’s pants pocket (not the coat pocket) the next time he was in for maintenance; well, that was nobody’s business besides its own.

And if it felt a nice, warm emotion when the cigars become a trademark of The Friendly Shadow soon after that, then that was something it planned to keep to itself.

Fortunately that wasn’t hard, because once the emotions died down, the work remained. There was still so much to do to keep Autodale running.

But as it worked, it found itself not minding its emotions so much. While it still had no intention of ever leaving Autodale, it occasionally allowed itself to indulge in the idea that perhaps one day, it would be able to share its emotions with others and wouldn’t have to hide in the shadows.

It was enough.


End file.
